HUMOR: FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS

“Calamity News and Politics believes in free speech no matter what your opinion. We however, do not think it is okay to threaten or insinuate harm to someone who disagrees with your opinion.  Stop bullies. Stand up for free speech.” (Editor: D. S. Mitchell) 

T.K. McNeil

For Whom the Bell Tolls

Death. One of the greatest fears in life. Though still not quite as much as public speaking. As Jerry Seinfeld pointed out, according to the statistics, more people would rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy. Or, as another notorious brain box once said, “life is beautiful, death is peaceful, it is the transition that can be troublesome.”

When A Writer Gets A Death Threat

You might well be wondering why the change? When did Calamity’s resilient humorist switch over to gallows humor? First of all, it’s not recent (as my essay “Dark Candy” will attest). Second, I’ve had  reason to meditate on the dead recently. Introspection brought on by betting some very creative death threats.

Not What You Think

I am used to criticism. You have to be when you write for a living. You can’t appeal to everyone and that is fine. Even if they fall short of Dorothy Parker in terms of their retorts. Things go pear-shaped when criticisms and retorts are replaced by violence and threats. This is why death threats can be so effective. Just the threat of violence is often enough. The issuing of a Fwata can be as, if not more, effective than an assault with machine-guns. As happened to British Novelist Salman Rushdie and the Charlie Hebdo offices respectively. There are few faster ways to silence someone than threatening to do it permanently.

Trump Card

Political violence is nothing new. The majority of assassinations in the last century or so were of a distinctly political flavor. Even in the last few years things have been amping up. It has come to the point where there are fist-fights and machine-guns at political rallies. There are even fatalities. Such as the death of Heather Heyer in Charlottesville. Trump has made many changes to the national fabric. Making it dangerous to engage in political discourse is one of the worst.

Heathen!

Imagine my surprise when the messages wishing me fiery death and parking tickets came not from my copious political writings. What really ticked off the loonies was my writing on the more fringe aspects of culture. Particularly those dealing with religion as well as subject the religious think they have a right to weigh in on. I am not someone who can stand to see people getting kicked for no reason. An attitude which has seen me speak up on behalf of everyone from Wiccans to Metalheads to independent porn producers  and modern LaVeyan Satanists. The last of whose ideology is basically atheism with a floor show, which they will be the first to tell you. While I am sometimes rather critical of those who persecute such groups, my goal is always to foster greater empathy. Even for people you might think you have nothing in common with.

Can’t Type Straight

Yet this has somehow lead to me being labeled, let me check my notes here, a “satanic, sinful, goat-f**king, god-hating, misogynist, pro-free market, baby killing, apostate who will suffer the righteous wrath of the faithful before enduring the eternal fires of hell.” I would have sent a reply but I was laughing so hard I couldn’t type straight.